January 3, 2009 In Uncategorized

2009 Resume Challenge

About a gazillion people have recently lost their jobs. They are likely scrambling to polish resumes that are a total bore (it’s OK.-that’s how we were taught to make them!) in hopes of gaining some type of employment before they have to give their houses back to the bank. 

Lets try something different.

Shred the eggshell colored bore of a resume that you have used before. The one that has all those terms and words like “Facilitated”, “Assisted with”, or “Lead a team”. Everybody has that resume. Do you really expect to stick out or wow anybody with that? What usually happens is a potential employer sees you went to the same university as their son, or grew up in the same state they did and then they become interested in you. No one really cares that much about the massive list companies you have “Lead a team of” so and so’s at. There are millions of people who have your degree or have held a job for at least a few years. Employers want to know if you are driven, reliable, honest, and great at what you do. They usually find that stuff out when you just break it all down and start a normal conversation.
Sure you have to have some professional background and experience, but if at some point in your interview you can get your potential new boss to say: “Me too! I played soccer in high school!” or “I backpacked through South America after college too!- It was amazing, and man did I love that food!” I promise you’ll be first on the hire list.
Type up (on whatever color card stock you damn well please that fits your personality) your contact information, a few bullets about:
*Your experiences (work, volunteer, certifications, etc.)
*What you are fabulous at and take pride in
*What you suck at or are continuously working on. (Nobody’s perfect. Be human) 
*3 References that you have experience with that have offered to truthfully promote you as nothing less then stellar to anyone who asks
If you want you can close your new resume with a short, sweet, honest “I want this job because (blank) and I am the best. Try me” Or whatever works for you.
At very least you’ll get a chuckle, interview or “I’ve never seen anything like this before-you’re hired!” Sure beats the alternative of X amount of your years and experience typed lifelessly on a piece of plain paper just piled with the other hundred on someone’s dusty desk.
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December 22, 2008 In Uncategorized

Fa la la la holy crap

My friend Allison says; “That is what happens when you live somewhere it doesn’t snow”

She’s right. And this is hilarious. Best part? This picture only captures about half of what was at this house. 
Kind of makes you wonder what these people are “rocking” around their Christmas tree. Man I bet they make some good Eggnog!
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December 15, 2008 In Uncategorized

“Mom, why the hell is there a homeless man staying in our garage?”


Where I grew up in VT, people don’t live in ski-chalets, milk maple syrup from trees early in the morning, or live next door to Ben&Jerry.

Oh no. Who would want to be that fancy? Instead, my family has “Deer Camp”.
Deer Camp where I am from, is a place (whether in your 2 car garage at your actual house, or at a log cabin in the woods), where hunters and random vagrants sit around telling stories, playing cards and drinking liquor and beer until they pass out. Wake-up call is something absurd like 3am, at which point the gents make and feast on a huge breakfast (usually something like bacon, eggs, venison sausage, or anything that would make a vegan puke at the thought.) Next it’s out to sit in the woods before dawn, likely up in a tree, most always in sub-zero temperatures, snow and all- in hopes a deer will stroll by that you can shoot at.
If you are “lucky” you’ll shoot one dead and get to drag it about 17 miles out of the woods and hang it in a tree until it’s ready to hack up or eat. (Example displayed in these lovely and completely unoffensive photos I took when I was home last week.)
Here’s to simultaneously loving where you came from and thanking god you got the hell out long ago. Although, I guess visiting home and being called “City Girl” by a bunch of deer campers has it’s charm on occasions.
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