i believe in transparency, and i’m not afraid

A fun interview story. A short from my life:

I got a call at 8:40am as I was racing out the door for my 9am 2nd round interview with company X. The woman on the phone:

“I’m so glad I caught you. We have decided to go in another direction so we won’t need you to come in.”

Really? Thanks. We scheduled this interview 5 days ago. Don’t wait until the last minute or anything. Would it have been asking too much for you to shoot me straight from the get go?

There’s more.

As in trash talking.

I don’t think I paid much attention when my interviews first started weeks ago. I typically try to ignore rude, immature, negative and unprofessional people in general, but it suddenly hit me a couple days ago: Every single one of these people and companies that I have interviewed with has talked trash about each other! I’m not talking one little mention of “Oooh, gosh, I don’t want to spread rumors- but I’d just be a bit careful of X, Y, Z.” No, it has been a full-on “Oh god- I’d NEVER work for that guy, he’s a psychopath!” and “Ugh!!!- I am telling this because I like you; that place is a nightmare.” and “Yeah, that place is awful and the woman who runs the office is a total witch.” Furthermore; (This one totally blew me out of the water upsetting me) When I shared the name of the recruiter I have been working with commenting that she has been lovely and very helpful to me- someone trashed talked her up and down too! Awful!

OUCH! Is this high school? Are we 16 years old? Am I on Candid Camera? These are people who make money and run successful businesses? It makes me sad and disappointed to think that adults/professional business people in a small fabulous community throw each other under the bus left and right like this. EEK! What does that mean they’d do to me as an employee? How would I be treated and who’d throw me under the bus for the fun of it?:( What happened to honesty and transparency? What happened to say it to my face and not behind my back? Why are people afraid to be honest and straightforward? Isn’t anyone else afraid out there that if you treat people like garbage, lie, try to knock people down just to be awful that karma will come back and bite you in the ass 10 times over?

I have to have faith that good people win, honesty is the best policy and when you are straight up and real, people with respect you. That’s how I was raised. My Mom reads this, my family reads this, lots and lots of people read this blog. I consistently get far more respect, thumbs up, love, fans and followers by throwing and eff-bomb here and there, telling true stories of my life, keeping smiles on my face and never giving up, than I ever would by being elusive, closed off, mean for the sake of being mean or telling half of reality and my life story.

I’ve talked a lot recently about how everyday as I grow older I love and respect those people more and more who shoot it straight. That’s the non-shit talkers, the people who will say things to me instead of behind my back in the purest and most honest way and respect and love me for saying the same to them. I don’t think there should be a separation in this kind of thing personally OR professionally. Wouldn’t we all get more done if we just gave it straight up from the get go or do we all really want to waste that much time skirting around issues to save face or because we fear pissing someone off? If I have to tip-toe that much around anyone or anything, clearly that someone or something and I are never going to get along. I was raised to work hard, be respectful, honest and care. To be considerate, try my best and treat others how I want to be treated. I work my ass off to do what I was taught. I’ve sometimes wondered why others don’t do the same or at least try. I brush off the occasional harsh reality and keep moving on with a smile. Recently I have experienced a bit more than normal of this harsh reality. What do I do to deal with it? Put a bigger, fatter smile on my face, feel proud of myself for simply trying and continue to piss people off with my honesty.

I figure if someone else is afraid of transparency and honesty- good for them. This girl? – Not so much afraid. If nothing else I’ll be able to fall asleep at night happy, knowing that I’m still doing all I can to practice what we all learned in Kindergarten.

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