Live the life you want to live

whoop whoop! this makes 1,001 posts

Whoa. It just dawned on me this morning that I might be nearing the ONE THOUSAND mark and I’ve already hit it! (I’m patting myself on the back right now.) This has been such a labor of love for me. I’ve relished in every minute of creating this thing that has taken on a life of it’s own. Funny, this morning I’m sitting in a coffee shop tapping away at my keyboard as I realize the 1,001 number. I actually haven’t brought my laptop out of the apartment for a few weeks because schlepping it around the city for an entire day while I fight my way through public transportation isn’t the most fun thing to do. I ran out of coffee to French press at home this morning, so here I sit out. I’m glad I hit over the 1,000 mark out during quiet coffee shop time. Coffee shops have provided me hundreds of hours of writing time.

I’ve tapped and typed away on this same laptop since the inception of BLR. I’ve driven to Alaska with this machine, posting all the way. I’ve moved 876 times, changed relationships, jobs, states, hair, mind-set, goals, and more since post #1. I never knew what any of this would be. What I do know is that by committing to this I have gained insight to things I never would have otherwise gained, I’ve kept expanding my mind in ways I never knew I could, I’ve shared every bit of dirty laundry I’ve ever had and liberated myself, and I’ve become utterly fearless discovering that we all really can actually do and say whatever the heck we want to.

Besides the above, one of the the biggest surprises has been the sense of trust and community this has created. I’ve made connections with incredible people that I would have otherwise never met because of this project. I’ve kept in touch with friends that may have otherwise fallen off the bandwagon of life. I’ve started and maintained what I know will be life-long friendships with complete strangers who’ve found this and followed daily. Funny enough the photo I planned on posting today was sent by one of these complete strangers, who over the course of 2 years become a fantastic, generous friend and a really fun dinner buddy.

Jukebox from Charlotte biker bar

(Thanks for the photo B! I love it when readers see ridiculous things and think of me.)

…another one of these perfect strangers turned friends who I got to meet last summer, emailed me yesterday excitedly asking when I could come visit and meet the baby she’s about to have.

How cool is that? Learning from and connecting to each other- that’s what it’s all about.

Here’s to the next 1,000 “posts” in the story, and for us all staying excited to see what else is down the Blue Lollipop Road….


let love rule

It downright BLOWS THE LID OFF MY MIND that the year is 2011, and we as a supposed intelligent society are still having issues with the fact that some people who are the same sex could be in love or want equal rights to the rest of us.

Is this the twilight zone?

The ignorance and hate on this subject when we live in a free country are incomprehensible.

Should we be calling it a milestone that as of yesterday June, 1, 2011 a 12th state (Illinois) now legally recognizes same-sex marriages? Why isn’t it or why hasn’t it been all 50 states all along? Wouldn’t it be nice to be celebrating a baby’s first steps, a productive day of work, a graduating senior or just a day spent with a friend, instead of celebrating something that shouldn’t have been an issue to even have to fight for in the first place?

I suppose any additional level of tolerance on a subject so many are hateful toward, or afraid of, is progress and positive. I just can’t imagine enduring the looks, comments, and inequalities that so many people live each day, for however long it takes to make that number 50 states, not just 12. I am not gay, but lots of people I love are, and one person in particular that I would protect until my last breath. I see these people hurt and misunderstood, time and time again and it absolutely breaks my heart.

Why can’t we just let love rule?.


tales of a female nomad


I’m a modern-day nomad. I have no permanent address, no possessions except the ones I carry, and I rarely know where I’ll be six months from now. I move through the world without a plan, guided by instinct, connecting by trust, and constantly watching for serendipitous opportunities.

People are my passion. Unlike a traditional nomad, when I go somewhere, I settle with the locals long enough to share the minutes of their days, to know the season of their lives, and to be trusted with their secrets. I have lived with people in thatched huts, slept in their gilded palaces, and worshipped with them at godly ceremonies and dens of black magic. I have also cooked with women on fires all over the world.

I’ve been living and loving my nomadic existence since the day in 1986 when, at the age of forty-eight, on the verge of a divorce, I looked around and thought: There has to be more than one way to do life.

There is.


I’m sorry I can’t remember who gifted me this book for Christmas 2005, although I am thinking it was probably my Mom. At least I had the date written on the inside of the front cover. I picked up my copy this morning to read again, then sent Author Rita an email (we’ve been in touch now for about 6 months) to which she immediately responded. (It’s pretty amazing, you read or hear about someone you think is fantastic, contact them to tell them that and they really do get back to you, which is of course the reason you thought they were fantastic in the first place; they are.)

Thanks for being such an inspiration Rita. The last paragraph of your preface is what continues to stay with me most about this book after 7 years. After rereading it again today I had to post it here.  There certainly is more than one way to “do” life and I fully plan to keep on doing it. Glad you are too!



what’s that nike says?

Some of my favorite conversation is the “What I really want to do.” You know, the:

*Well I couldn’t possibly do that

*Everyone will think I am crazy

*I’d feel awful moving so far away from my friends

*My parents would be so upset if I did that

*I shouldn’t be so selfish

*Why can’t I just “grow up” and be Ok, with where I am and what I’m doing now?

….oh how I could go on.

I had yet another one of these conversations last night with a friend who has a legitimate itch she wants and needs to scratch. She’s got a goal, a dream, the total drive, ambition, personality and experience to make it like a rock star and then some, but she’s stuck in herself right now. You know, that place where we all get to before we either:

A.) Push, push and end up going for it.

B.) Give up and  live in complacency.

When are we going to stop feeling the guilt, convincing ourselves we are crazy, or listening to other people who tell us we “shouldn’t” want certain things our souls ache to be/do? I am guilty of falling into the “gosh I shouldn’t” at times too, but thankfully I have kept those cheerleaders around me who only have to look at me in that way they do, and I get back on my horse and ride again.

Watch out people; I am “crazy” Auntie, friend, sister, daughter, co-worker, coach, neighbor, (insert whatever other title here)- that will always tell you to go for it, and live the life you want to live. (Have you seen the new Blue Lollipop Road tagline?:)

Gasp! I am encouraging throwing caution to the wind and actually living the live you want to. That is doing work that works for each of us, being around people we can learn from, feeding our mind, body, soul in whatever ways we need and allowing ourselves to change things when it’s the right time to change.

If you are someone out there who wants to go, be, try, do something and an actual or phantom person in your head is telling you that you’re crazy or wrong, just remember the only thing that will ever be crazy or wrong is living inside a life you don’t want at all.

Go for it S.B..