Blue Lollipop Road

recess, sabbatical, furlough…

…whatever you want to call it. I am taking one from here. Overwhelmed? Not really. Stressed? Nah. Feeling like I don’t want to share my every thought, decision and move with everyone, every second of my day so I can actually have a clear head and worry about only me? YES. Totally.

Absolutely I realize sharing everything is what I signed up for. I love transparency, most of the time. My life has been one big transparency-fest. I’ve turned myself into a giant piece of Saran Wrap and I’m feeling like I need to be more of a tarp right now. (Yes, like the blue thick ones you buy at Lowe’s and Home Depot.)

I want to live in a big fat city. That is SF, Chicago, DC, NY. If I can’t live in one of those I want to make enough money to be able to go to them as much as I can. In order to figure out how I can do this when I have like negative zero dollars in the bank, I need more time to game plan, brainstorm and all that fun stuff even more than I already do. Blue Lollipop Road is my life and my love, but makes me no loot so right now it must take a bit of a back burner to things that make me loot so I can actually live where I want to live. If I keep moving to places I really don’t want to, or making peanuts for money just because a job falls in my lap, I will never be at my best and I’ll have to keep moving to stay interested, engaged. I will also never have $2 to my name. That’s just silly. I’ve loved my time being a professional vagabond. Change is good, but I have moved 96 million times in the past 14 years. I have learned a TON, but now I’m flippin’ tired. I am way too talented and capable of having my own business or working for someone else who will pay me a decent amount for my talents and experience to not be funneling all my energy into a great concept or company in one place/city/state. I’m ready to put that 14 years of being a professional vagabond and trier of all things to good use.

So?- I’m funneling right now. If you hear nothing but crickets here, on Twitter, Facebook, email, phone, etc.- don’t be surprised. I’m fabulous, I’m healthy, happier and more confident than I’ve ever been. I’m just taking some extra time to make major headway on my future.

I promise I’ll show back up here, bounding and smiling soon enough. As I sit in San Fransisco today, it seems a perfect time to quote The Governator:

“I’ll be back.”

decisions, decisions

Life is one big fat adventure right? You never know what’s going to pop up and say “OOH! Pick me!”-or when you will hear nothing but silence. As one of my readers commented recently “It’s always feast or famine with you isn’t it Diane?”

That makes me giggle.

Well, I suppose so. I choose to think of “it” as one big ol’ feast though. There’s never been famine in my life. I’m constantly feasting on experiences, mistakes, food, people, places, opportunity and so much more. Some think I’m crazy, some think I’m great, some think I’m an immature fool. I’m just happy being me. I’ve tried to be other people. It never works.

In a moment of frustration some weeks ago with my schizophrenic decision process of should I stay (in California) or should I go now and trying to manage the advice and input of way too many people, (even though I have known what I wanted to do since leaving NYC in July), I told my Mother on the phone that I know I might infuriate some people all to hell, I know I might make lots of mistakes or look like a nutcase sometimes, but I’m just living my truth. I can guarantee if my funeral was tomorrow not one single person would feel a bit sorry for me. People know that I have LIVED. I know I have LIVED. That makes me happy.

Her best Mom ever and agreeing response; “That’s right darlin’.”

Learning about who you really are, accepting who you are and feeling fully confident about it is no easy task. I work on it every day. I’d like to say I feel a bit wiser or confident because of my age (you know, all that “when you get to a certain age” stuff) but I really think that my drive to Alaska this summer and time here in California this fall, in a whopping total of 4 months- have shown me more of who I am and what I know for sure than the previous almost 32 years of my life have. I’m still trying to wrap my brain around this. I’t been a surprising but welcomed discovery.

A couple of these “know for sure” things:

1.) When you have a burn to do something, a thought or thing that wont go away- you’re a fool if you don’t do it. Not to get all Field of Dreams on everyone here, but for real?- If you build it, try it, go for it- it will come. You MUST trust your gut and your instincts. You simply cannot fail if you put your true heart and soul into something.

2.) It’s pretty safe to say, you will always flop, fail, be unhappy, and have regrets in if you don’t trust your gut and your instincts; With every choice you make.

Saying this, my journey continues as originally planned- back east in a few weeks. The total bummer of this story is that In a miniscule amount of time at a job I have had in California, I have 100% fallen in love with the crew of people I work with. I hope they will be my friends forever. A crew like mine here are a rare find and not an easy one to leave, but instinct- all that heart gut, and opportunity tell me east right now so that’s the direction the little Civic that could will go. So? I wrap up a most lovely harvest fall season working in Napa Valley wine, and never forget my time here. I will think of this experience and these people any time I question my decisions. Most doubt quickly fades when I’m reminded that I’m making my decisions based on the most important things.

Thank you to all who have stuck by me as friends, family and followers during the “rat race” (as my Mother has lovingly called it since submitting a few words and a baby photo to the yearbook my senior year in high school.) You know I don’t forget people. I love you for loving me.

Let the race continue…

***Most importantly for today: THANK YOU TO ALL MILITARY MEN AND WOMEN. Special shout out to my friends Andrew and Alex. Hats off a million times over.

farm girl flowers is born!

Congratulations to my friend Christina for the launch of her fabulous company Farm Girl Flowers!

Check out her website here and she what she’s up to. She’s bringing gorgeous, fresh, local flowers to people all over San Fransisco at a ridiculously affordable price. Pass the word if you have a friend in the bay area or heck, send the peeps you know there some fresh flowers yourself!

Blue Lollipop Road always supports anyone following their dreams. Especially when they are being green and giving a great deal too. Go Christina!

“honey, gas up the jet ski!”

My friend sent me an email with the following directions so I followed:

‎1. Goto Google maps.
2. Go to “Get Directions.”
3. Type Japan as the start location.
4. Type China as the end location.
5. Go to direction #43….
6. Laugh

Now that’s pretty funny. Oh that Google, they’re always being so fun and creative!

twisted

Reveling in my day off from work relaxation time, I was just uploading photos, finishing a book, and was thrilled to catch up on one of my guilty pleasures; Watching missed episodes of Desperate Housewives online at abc.com. I finished watching my show, and a window for Match.com popped up. Here’s the link. As I was about to X out of the screen, what do I see on the left column?- A marital status button.

WHAT?

Am I missing something?

Call me granny panties, old- fashioned, out of the loop- whatever, but why in the bleep would a match making/dating site have a marital status button?!?! Does this thing let you post your profile to read; Single 30-something female who likes long walks on the beach and to travel- seeks married dudes to date. No offense to those who have found true love on the internet, but now I can add one more reason I think online dating is ridiculous. I mean, to each his own. I just don’t think I’ll ever lean over to one of my gal pals to say, or post something online that says “Sweet! Bob is married!? Hook a sister UP!”

Sheesh. I don’t get it.