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blr turns 2 in 3 short days!!!

Get ready for a PAAARTAAAY!!!

YIPPEE!

We’ve come a long way baby 🙂

i believe in transparency, and i’m not afraid

A fun interview story. A short from my life:

I got a call at 8:40am as I was racing out the door for my 9am 2nd round interview with company X. The woman on the phone:

“I’m so glad I caught you. We have decided to go in another direction so we won’t need you to come in.”

Really? Thanks. We scheduled this interview 5 days ago. Don’t wait until the last minute or anything. Would it have been asking too much for you to shoot me straight from the get go?

There’s more.

As in trash talking.

I don’t think I paid much attention when my interviews first started weeks ago. I typically try to ignore rude, immature, negative and unprofessional people in general, but it suddenly hit me a couple days ago: Every single one of these people and companies that I have interviewed with has talked trash about each other! I’m not talking one little mention of “Oooh, gosh, I don’t want to spread rumors- but I’d just be a bit careful of X, Y, Z.” No, it has been a full-on “Oh god- I’d NEVER work for that guy, he’s a psychopath!” and “Ugh!!!- I am telling this because I like you; that place is a nightmare.” and “Yeah, that place is awful and the woman who runs the office is a total witch.” Furthermore; (This one totally blew me out of the water upsetting me) When I shared the name of the recruiter I have been working with commenting that she has been lovely and very helpful to me- someone trashed talked her up and down too! Awful!

OUCH! Is this high school? Are we 16 years old? Am I on Candid Camera? These are people who make money and run successful businesses? It makes me sad and disappointed to think that adults/professional business people in a small fabulous community throw each other under the bus left and right like this. EEK! What does that mean they’d do to me as an employee? How would I be treated and who’d throw me under the bus for the fun of it?:( What happened to honesty and transparency? What happened to say it to my face and not behind my back? Why are people afraid to be honest and straightforward? Isn’t anyone else afraid out there that if you treat people like garbage, lie, try to knock people down just to be awful that karma will come back and bite you in the ass 10 times over?

I have to have faith that good people win, honesty is the best policy and when you are straight up and real, people with respect you. That’s how I was raised. My Mom reads this, my family reads this, lots and lots of people read this blog. I consistently get far more respect, thumbs up, love, fans and followers by throwing and eff-bomb here and there, telling true stories of my life, keeping smiles on my face and never giving up, than I ever would by being elusive, closed off, mean for the sake of being mean or telling half of reality and my life story.

I’ve talked a lot recently about how everyday as I grow older I love and respect those people more and more who shoot it straight. That’s the non-shit talkers, the people who will say things to me instead of behind my back in the purest and most honest way and respect and love me for saying the same to them. I don’t think there should be a separation in this kind of thing personally OR professionally. Wouldn’t we all get more done if we just gave it straight up from the get go or do we all really want to waste that much time skirting around issues to save face or because we fear pissing someone off? If I have to tip-toe that much around anyone or anything, clearly that someone or something and I are never going to get along. I was raised to work hard, be respectful, honest and care. To be considerate, try my best and treat others how I want to be treated. I work my ass off to do what I was taught. I’ve sometimes wondered why others don’t do the same or at least try. I brush off the occasional harsh reality and keep moving on with a smile. Recently I have experienced a bit more than normal of this harsh reality. What do I do to deal with it? Put a bigger, fatter smile on my face, feel proud of myself for simply trying and continue to piss people off with my honesty.

I figure if someone else is afraid of transparency and honesty- good for them. This girl? – Not so much afraid. If nothing else I’ll be able to fall asleep at night happy, knowing that I’m still doing all I can to practice what we all learned in Kindergarten.

and you think i’m kidding

I know I have loosely joked about having to go home to Vermont and live with my parents before. This is becoming a quick reality as I start week 5 of busting my ass to find a job here in CA and nothing working yet. (Perhaps a sign that I should’ve followed my initial instinct and heart to NYC?) I’ve been trying to get my parents divorced for years, I DESPISE cold weather and piles of snow and they live in a town that everything closes at 6pm. (Can you say one flashing stop light and a country store? A regular metropolis.) Clearly not the ideal situation for a single 32 year old like me who wants to bust ass to move back to that for the first time since I was 17.

I totally suck at waiting for people to call and offer me work after I have applied and interviewed. I just move fast. It’s in my nature. I suck so badly at not working 60 hours a week or driving 800 miles a day it’s absurd. This is the way I was born and I just can’t help it.

This week should be interesting to see what potentially pans out here. If a comet doesn’t drop out of the sky soon with 3 jobs or a bunch of cash, it looks like the BLR mobile will be heading east to stay with the folks until I can make enough money selling my soul to the devil so I can move to New York City.

Stay tuned. If the shackin’ up with the folks thing happens, I will officially rename this blog How Many Days. (As in how many days will it take for me to jump off a cliff.)

Don’t worry, I’m not suicidal. Just trying to be funny and entertain myself so I don’t become suicidal while I apply and interview for 96,000 more jobs to places that need help but never call back.

can a girl get a job already?

I wrote a few days ago that I was totally annoyed and pissed off, so instead of punching a wall, I was going to go for a run. I do that a lot. I went for that run, put the smile back on my face and kept swinging the bat. That’s life right? Fall down, get up, get really pissed, keep trying and “it will all work out.” I really do believe that. That whole quitters never win thing? Yeah, I completely think that’s true. Sometimes though, things just build and build and then you want to punch a wall and scream FUUUUUUCK!!!!!!! to the high heavens.

That’s how I felt when I woke up this morning.

I didn’t write yesterday when I was feeling pissed off. I am all about shitty days, accepting and understanding when you feel like garbage. That’s normal. If something in life isn’t working, we all have the right to vent in whatever way works for each of us. As much as I say that, the last thing I have ever wanted to be is a complainer. I haven’t wanted this to be a bitch blog, or become that person who pisses and moans and never gets off their ass to fix a problem. We all know we don’t want to be around that kind of bad energy. Moreover, I generally do not feel sorry for anyone who just complains and sits on their ass. In fact I find that really friggin’ annoying. I mean, people who don’t have effing legs run marathons- get off your ass and do something complainers.

Why am I so pissed off and why do I have the desire to punch a wall this weekend? Because sometimes I feel like I do EVERYTHING BUT sit on my ass, and STILL things don’t click or move. In this particular case, what’s pissing me off is work, as in- a job, a way to make money, a way to pay bills.

For anyone who talks about some bullshit that the economy is bad, there are no jobs, no opportunity, etc., this is simply NOT the case. I have never in my life had more people offer to help or connect me, seen more “we are hiring” signs, been asked to send my resume, invited to interview, networking events- all that stuff. It’s out there for the taking. I’ve answered all that by putting a smile on my face, dressing my not so ugly body in killer outfits, I’ve shaken hands, kissed babies, worn “I’m a badass chick” heels and practically flown into meetings in a hot air balloon to multiple spots/places/businesses to try and get a job. I’ve gone to places and met with people who “desperately need help.” I’m overqualified for most positions. This is not a case of “we aren’t hiring at this time” or “I’m sorry, you have don’t have enough experience for this job.” Quite the opposite. The straight and dirty is this: I have found people and businesses to be totally inconsiderate by not returning calls or communication when they say they will. They also all seem to move at a freaking snails pace. I’m going on 5 weeks here. (By the way, for everyone out there who says things like, “these things take time, be patient, it will all come, etc- give me a goddamn break. Yeah, “it will come” when I’m 90 or when the bank repo’s my car. Jesus christ already- please stop saying those obvious and annoying, patronizing statements in an attempt to make us feel better. It doesn’t work.)

What person or company in their right mind, that “desperately” needs help either A.) Never calls back even though they tell you they will or B.) Would be willing to let a person like me (32, single, experienced, honest, reliable, driven, smart, energetic, DYING to work 90 hours a week, who has a laundry list of references and will even scoop shit with a smile) out of their sight without hiring them on the spot?

I have had COUNTLESS conversations with educated, amazing, experienced 30-somethings who are in the same boat as me in this. If I had my own business, I’d kill to have kick-ass 30-somethings that are out there unemployed crushing it in my company.

So what gives?

***Please note here that I take FULL responsibility for myself and I first and foremost think the what could I have done better? What could I be doing wrong? I even ask friends and mentors. Then, when all lights seem green and things STILL aren’t working? -Yeah, I want to punch a fucking wall. (Ok, so not really, but it makes me infuriated confused.)

This is why I have said for years that I want to work for myself.

Do I think I am the smartest, coolest, best ever or have a killer product? No. Do I think I know more and am some kind of business whiz? No. Do I want to struggle to build everything from the ground up, pay for my own health insurance forever and never get a paid vacation? No, but I do want to just fucking work a job that I can use my experience and talents for and in turn be paid and respected. These opportunities don’t seem to exist in America, or I am looking in the wrong 50 states.

It all leaves me baffled, disappointed, and with little faith in EVERY one/thing/business out there. Perhaps this is a sign for me to gather all those 30-something’s. We will band together and create a business that kicks everyone else’s antiquated and inconsiderate, unorganized ass. Green Eggs and Ham says: “I will not, will not anywhere!” Well, I am: “I will I will! and ANYWHERE!” and still no takers. That deserves a giant WHAT THE FUCK.

(Wow, it’s a good thing I’m not religious. A Sunday post like this full of cuss this and that would surely land me in hell otherwise:)

To people and businesses out there missing out on the 30-something talent that’s available like me and so many others, who want to bust our asses for you: Congratulations. You are idiots. To people or businesses in any city, state, country who want young blood ready and willing to crush it and make YOU money. Send me an email (dianeATbluelollipoproadDOTcom) or post a comment here and I will send you my resume and laundry list of experiences and references. Clearly I JUST WANT A FUCKING JOB and I know a big ol’ list of others like me ready too.

I could always start seriously considering prostitution. I mean, I am really friendly so I’d probably do well.

I know- GASP!-right? By now you are probably rolling your eyes, shaking your head and mumbling something like “My god this girl thinks she’s going to get someone to give her a job after writing something like this and using the word fuck 100 times?” or “No wonder she can’t find a job with a mouth like that!, she must be crazy!”

Yeah there’s a time and a place for everything, but I also think it’s perfectly acceptable to be no bullshit.

I love having a blog.

if your name is aimee and you posted a comment…

….here today, please send me contact information for you or email me:
dianeATbluelollipoproadDOTcom

I’d love to help you/your brother out with finance stuff. I posted a reply to your comment too.Thanks for checking out my blog and I hope to hear from you soon!

friday night dinner parties…

…are so fun. Especially when it was your roommies birthday this week so you’re celebrating and your other roommie has made Beef Bourguignon. Hello Julie Child! I’m making 2 ridiculous chocolate desserts (recipes stolen from 2 gal pals of mine.) I was also gifted a yummy bottle of Pinot Noir after an interview with a winery today (I know score!- right?) I’m fairly confident the night is going to be a blast and it hasn’t even started yet.

Did I mention I’m on a diet and that I’m a vegetarian?

Yeah, yeah, insert laughs here.

I’ve never had many recipes to share, but this one is a must-pass from my friend Holly if you are a chocolate lover like me. Double chocolate Oreo dessert balls:

Buy:
*Chocolate or vanilla baking bark (baking chocolate bars of some kind, 4 large bars.)
*1 pkg. (8 oz.) cream cheese, softened.
*1 pkg. Oreo cookies

Then:
Melt chocolate in double boiler and add solid vegetable shortening, ½ tsp. at a time as needed to make the mixture smooth. (Do not add liquid oil or water as the chocolate will clump). Chop the entire package of Oreo cookies with a food chopper or put in large Ziploc bag and crush them. Mix with cream cheese. Scoop out balls of mixture using a small scoop. Place in freezer until firm (30 min. to 1 hr.) Dip in melted chocolate, one a time, and place on parchment paper or wax paper until set. Store in an airtight container in the refrigerator. (Freeze the balls until they are solid, dip them and get them out of the chocolate right away.)

Other tips:
If you do some them in white chocolate, you can drizzle some dark chocolate over them to make creative designs.

Sweet! (In every kind of way.)

Let the dinner party begin.

sigh

I’m staying in Napa for now and I still dream about NYC every single day.

Try to figure that one out.

someone please clue me in

I might be an alien, but I was taught to say please and thank you and do what I promise to do.

Am I crazy?

I don’t often get to the point I feel like I could punch a wall and today feels like one of those days. Instead of punching a wall, I go for long runs (which I am about to head out door to do now. I figure that’s more constructive than punching things.)

I am currently going through a time where people who say they will call won’t, promise things they don’t do, and generally are disappointing me. People are busy, shit happens, I get it. It’s not that. It’s the point blank empty promises and complete lack of respect or consideration that gets me.

I just don’t understand. Why bother with the bullshit? Who has time for that?

…off to pound the pavement instead of the wall. Perhaps while I am away from my computer and phone breaking a sweat, one of those promised messages will finally come in. If not I’ll just have a really nice ass, which hey- I am not opposed to.

jill won the makeover!

YIPPEE!!! Jill Campbell wins! (Well, one of the top 3 anyway. The Grand Prize winner will be announced the night of the makeover.)

I posted this last week asking you all to vote for my friend and she won! I’m convinced that the BLR followers helped tip her over the the line to victory! Thanks all! I am super excited for Jill. I’ll be posting the before and after photos here in a couple weeks after the big makeover day.

Stay tuned to see results!

knotty yarn

So I have told you all I bartended at this retreat called the Might Summit a couple weeks ago. It was near the Russian River at an amazing little resort called Boon. It was a quick gig, and I didn’t get to talk to many of the kick-ass women who were there. There were a couple of those women however, that even in our 5 second interaction I could tell were just NICE. The word nice, or kind to me is by far the biggest compliment. When someone can get a “nice” out of me, from a simple please and thank you, because it just hits you that they are a genuinely decent person- that’s a big deal.

Danielle was one of those people. Her blog is called Knotty Yarn. It has just gone straight and fast into my bookmarks. On her about page (almost scary the amount of similarities between she and I) there is a line that I so, so so (can I say SO one more time?) agree with and live by:

“I strongly believe that every day is a chance to change your mind and change your life.”

I will stop this post there. I can’t imagine putting together a better line that i will toast a thousand times to.

Thanks Danielle. You are nice, you write great stuff, and you have freaking awesome hair too.