Blue Lollipop Road

Fa la la la holy crap

My friend Allison says; “That is what happens when you live somewhere it doesn’t snow”

She’s right. And this is hilarious. Best part? This picture only captures about half of what was at this house. 
Kind of makes you wonder what these people are “rocking” around their Christmas tree. Man I bet they make some good Eggnog!
0
0

“Mom, why the hell is there a homeless man staying in our garage?”


Where I grew up in VT, people don’t live in ski-chalets, milk maple syrup from trees early in the morning, or live next door to Ben&Jerry.

Oh no. Who would want to be that fancy? Instead, my family has “Deer Camp”.
Deer Camp where I am from, is a place (whether in your 2 car garage at your actual house, or at a log cabin in the woods), where hunters and random vagrants sit around telling stories, playing cards and drinking liquor and beer until they pass out. Wake-up call is something absurd like 3am, at which point the gents make and feast on a huge breakfast (usually something like bacon, eggs, venison sausage, or anything that would make a vegan puke at the thought.) Next it’s out to sit in the woods before dawn, likely up in a tree, most always in sub-zero temperatures, snow and all- in hopes a deer will stroll by that you can shoot at.
If you are “lucky” you’ll shoot one dead and get to drag it about 17 miles out of the woods and hang it in a tree until it’s ready to hack up or eat. (Example displayed in these lovely and completely unoffensive photos I took when I was home last week.)
Here’s to simultaneously loving where you came from and thanking god you got the hell out long ago. Although, I guess visiting home and being called “City Girl” by a bunch of deer campers has it’s charm on occasions.
0
0

Breakin’ the law

So this morning as usual, I used the mens bathroom instead of the women’s-even though I am female. I do this about 50% of the time because my fellow ladies always take way too long and it drives me bonkers. Ladies; What the hell could you possibly be doing in there? Seriously, does my pee come out faster than yours or something? I manage to pee, wash hands, mirror check and still get in and out in under a minute or two. 


Check out this sign and article on the subject. 
Illegal to use the bathroom of the opposite sex?! WHAT!? Lock me up then and throw away the key then! I am not going to start waiting in that freaking line with the rest of the ladies of the world anytime soon.
0
0

GET UP!

I shared the Hungry Hiker breakfast the last week at Up For Breakfast. Oh how yummy the pancakes were at this Manchester, VT spot. (Oops, I forgot to take the picture before I starting eating. I got excited, what can I say?)
Yeah, I know I write about food all the time. Noshing is one of my favorite things to do. Particularly at mom-and-pop joints where you can meet the coolest and most interesting people and typically leave with your pants popping you’re so full. Not to mention other great things like spending very little money, tasting homemade/local fare and being referred to as “honey” or “sweetie”. oh the pleasantries. 
They aren’t kidding when they say up for breakfast. This place closes at noon, so forget sleeping in and getting late brunch drunkies. UP AND ATEM!
Wouldn’t it be fabulous to get paid to eat? That Road Food guy should call me. I’d be a swell sidekick.
0
0

Go take a flying leap

Someone told me a long time ago when I was stressing about what I should do “with the rest of my life”, that “You just have to find something to give a shit about”. Makes perfect sense actually. If you give a shit about something-you will most likely do it well or be good at it. 

If you are having one of those days (ugh, yes I can totally relate), ask yourself; What do I really give a shit about? And then beg, borrow and steal until you can figure out a way to make money at it.
I am currently attempting this because I know first hand trying to convince yourself to do something you don’t really want to do, or hating your job pretty much blows. On the flip side- it pretty much rocks when you decide to do what you truly love. 
Rock it out people. There’s no time like the present.
0
0

No raw sugar!?

Bfast this morning at Penny Cluse in Burlington, VT was good. A scrambled egg and white cheddar cheese sandwich on crispy and buttery sourdough is what I opted for. The rest of our table was filled with corn muffins, biscuits, chunky home fries, and huevos rancheros. YUM. 
This place is usually always packed, but being a Monday morning with the temperature at 1 degree (Brrrr…) left a few seats empty and ready to welcome us, along with a group of friendly and smiley hippie waitresses. The floors were wet and muddy from snow, and that fantastic chill, Vermonter relaxed mood made me happy. Too bad it is so effin cold there in the winter I could never hack it for more than a visit.  
At least I have this perfect spot to warm and fill me up when I’m there! Now if they could just stock some raw sugar for my coffee…

0
0

And then the eggs came…

(Yes- a lot of the titles I write will be my own randomness, or inside jokes you may not get. Just roll with it, they are funny-trust me.)

So I returned home from a wedding and tour around India about a week ago. 

Wow.
I am sure I will have plenty more stories and images to share from this trip, but I wanted to start with this one for a laugh. It is a camel approaching a toll booth, on a highway next to our bus, along with cars, bikes, scooters, rickshaws with a guy (see the dangling legs?) riding along.
 
Yes. Really. Oh- and there is SO much more…
1
0

The Pizza Nazi

You’ve been here, you just don’t remember because you had too many car-bombs. Downtown Richmond, cash only, NY style pizza?…It’s the pizza joint at 18th and Main. 

If you ever been here sober, you might find it offensive and never step foot inside again. I find it entertaining whether I am drunk or sober and choose ignore the filth. 

Plan on having your money ready and don’t ask any questions. Pay, eat and get the hell out. That’s the style and it’s great. Time is money for these guys and when a hundred drunks are in line-they aren’t screwing around with any chit-chat.
Here’s a sign they have up. Check your attitude at the door, or your pie could get pricey.
You tell me where else at 2am you can buy a lighter, a condom, a hot slice of pizza, fight a crowd to get pissy service and possibly get puked on-all within 30 seconds. 
It’s charming really.
0
0